How to survive your police career

Police Speak 2 – The Sequel

Police Speak 2 – The Sequel

A further selection of foreign words and phrases which really need to be imbedded in our policing vocabulary …



Chinese. “… we’re going to wei-wu-wei …” – making a conscious decision to respond to a situation by doing … well, absolutely nothing, thank you very much …


Czech. That moment in someone’s life where they suddenly realise just how rubbish their life is …


Spanish. A condition suffered by that person on the team that’s always moaning about the cold.

“Pena Ajena”

Spanish. That painful embarrassment you feel for someone – perhaps the new Acting Sergeant – called upon to speak publicly to an audience and then completely screwing it up.


Spanish. The general feeling of awfulness that you get from sleep deprivation having spent months working 24/7 rotating shifts.


Spanish. A condition apparently suffered by that person on the team who’s always moaning about the cold.


German. ‘Grief bacon’ – the unnecessary weight that you pile on from comfort-eating because you’re fed up, it’s the middle of week-day nights, and you don’t go on leave for another six months.


Korean. That emotional intelligence demonstrated by the officer who’s particularly good at listening to people, gauging their mood, and knowing what to say or do to make things better … as opposed to unnunchi – the officer that’s just rubbish at that type of thing and can always be relied upon to screw things up when talking to people.


Italian. A person so addictive to tanning salons or products that they’re permanently orange.


Arabic. A solution to a situation which is good for everyone! “… it’s okay Control, taarradhin has been achieved at this community issue …” as opposed to untaarradhin where you drive off into the sunset having left nobody happy, knowing you’ll be sent back out to the same call as soon as you buy some hot refs.


I say foreign – it’s actually Scottish. A proper bunfight where assistance is required from other officers.


South African. Being found asleep on the floor – probably naked – as a result of extreme intoxication.

French. A ruined opportunity to put things right caused by the hopeless response of all involved.

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